My Skeptical Heart — Letting Go Of Worry
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We can trust God. Then, why do we still worry?
Worry feels so intuitive that the times I don’t do it, I worry that I’m being careless. That’s why I love vacations so much. It’s like getting a permission slip to stop worrying. Sometimes I try to cure myself of worry by psyching myself out. I tell myself to pretend I’m on vacation.
It doesn’t work.
Another tactic I’ve used to stop worrying is to combine pure determination with logic or even reciting memory verses.
I can do it! I tell myself. But, white-knuckling gets tiring. Worse yet, I end up with an added dose of guilt for not standing up to worry.
I was praying faithfully about the things that bothered me, but I couldn’t shake my worries.
Am I Really Important To God?
So, what’s keeping me from letting go?
“Do not worry…
Look at the birds of the air,
that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns,
and yet your heavenly Father feeds them.
Are you not worth much more than they?”
~ Jesus in Matthew 6:26
I know the Sunday School answer. But, the answer my heart gives is faint. I’m not entirely convinced that I’m enough.
It even feels a bit egotistical to ask whether I’m really all that important to God. After all, hasn’t the key always been to focus on God and not myself?
But, here Jesus is, telling us not to worry for the simple reason that God thinks we’re important.
It sounds so good that my skeptical heart feels it’s too good to be true. I get the same feeling every time I see those emails clog up my spam box, telling me I can get a free iPad for just taking a survey.
Carrying My Rocks
I realize the reason I can’t shake my worries even though I pray is this: Every time I lift up my concerns and problems to God in prayer, I quietly slip those rocks of burdens back into my bag and carry them out with me at Amen.
I know God means well, but I just would feel better if I had them back. Because, after all, who knows if God is really that happy with me?
Better take care of me.
Voila. That is how worry litters my path.
What God Wants
There is a happy ending to this story because Jesus really is very kind. He does love me so very much that He spoke to me during a song we sang one Sunday Service.
God is bigger than my mountain,
bigger than my valley,
bigger than my problem,
bigger than my pain,
Our God, God is faithful.
~ Lyrics to “God is Faithful”
by Norman Hutchins
Maybe if I let go of trying to manage my life, I would see God leading me through it.
God is faithful, not only to do what He intends to do.
God is faithful to love me. He pursues me because He actually wants me to trust Him.
You are very important to me, Bonnie. Give me a chance to prove my love to you.
Let go of your worries and take my hand.
What’s Following You
If you look behind you and find worry and preoccupation dogging you — as they have me — turn with me to take a chance with Jesus.
Let the worst fears see the light of day. Let the plate you’ve been juggling fall. See how God can take matters into His hands. See how God can take you in His hands.
We learn day by day, to see surely goodness and mercy following us — as we bleep like sheep and let our problems play out in our Shepherd’s hands.
Maybe we’d end up discovering how much we’re really worth.
I’m sure of it.
God is faithful.
What are your top 1 or 2 worries?
Visualize yourself leaving those worries at the throne of Christ the next time you pray and leave them there at “Amen”.
Jesus knows we will return to try and load up worries back into our packs. So this exercise is a daily expression of faith that comes with an unending supply of grace. We are free from guilt and judgment each time it happens.
Share how you let go of worry. I would love to hear!
Listen & Enjoy
Listen and enjoy this wonderful praise song that inspired today’s post. I hope it encourages your heart like it does mine today!
*** NOW, IT’S YOUR TURN — FAITH BARISTA JAM! ***
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Today’s topic: Letting Go Of Worry
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Next week’s 9/30 Topic: Discovering God’s Purpose For Me
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