For those joining in the Faith Barista Jam today: At the end of the post, click the blue button to submit the url
of your post on "Faith & Personality". If you don't have a post to share, no worries. Just comment!Is an individual’s personality set in stone or do other factors influence behavior? I say faith trumps everything because faith can actually change your personality.
When I was single, I’d see tons of articles about dating written to help everybody assess a potential girlfriend or boyfriend’s personality. We wouldn’t want to waste time going out with someone whose personality was incompatible with ours, would we?
After I got married, the topic of personality didn’t die down. It only intensified, as marriage experts offered relationship advice, based on the presumption that people really don’t change all that much.
Now that I’m a mom of two boys, I see the same sort of fascination with personality applied to the parenting. I was surprised to read about a study published last month on LiveScience that asserts one’s personality is set for life by 1st grade.
While there are genetic as well as psychological and social factors that create deep impressions into our personality make-up during early childhood, the role of faith is missing from the whole conversation.
The Spark
Faith is the biggest catalyst to changing our personality, but it’s not all that popular. That’s because faith is not intuitive. Self-improvement is.
I used to feel defeated trying to get rid of negative traits I saw in my personality. There was always an initial boost whenever I tried something new to become less stressed and more relaxed. But whatever I did could never be sustained indefinitely.
Failure didn’t stop me. I kept myself busy, inspired to change, always up to something new.
This all felt very self-empowering, until I hit a perfect storm of problems. Fears of losing my job, a growing number of disappointments and spiritual confusion over what God was doing in my life did a number on my personality.
I lost my spark.
You wouldn’t have known on the outside. Everything was chugging along fine. But I felt the truth inside. Something had changed deep within. I had lost my joy.
Joy is the sunshine that brings our God-given, unique personalities to life. Without this light, everything feels flat and muted.
I was working way too hard inside my heart.
Type Faith
I don’t have a short story to tell about how I got my spark back. God took me through a dusty road through the wilderness, stripped down to my resources.
Real changes, good or bad, usually happen like a slow drip from the pipe underneath the kitchen sink. Before you know it, you feel a damp puddle where the paper towels used to be stocked. I became more Type A than ever before. I focused on problem solving to get rid of the uncertainty. I fell into stretches of stress and anxiety, managing everything but my inner fears.
It was there I discovered God can restore my spiritual personality.
I learned to depend on Him. I learned to wait, to listen, and to surrender. It became more important to me to feel God’s presence than to have my problems solved.
I didn’t think it was possible to recapture the easy going and care-free naivitee I always wanted. But, God created a new spark in me despite my unbelief. He’s created something that wasn’t there before. He restored love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control in new ways.
I’m no longer Type A. I just became that way because I wanted to control my circumstances.
Once I realized my efforts were futile, I began to see God take control of me. I became Type F (Faith).
It’s better to consider every thing a loss, in order to see God at work in me.
I am now learning to discover the personality God designed in me.
Faith is what unwraps it a little more every day.
~~~~~
People can change because God changes people. If we believe He can do it, this belief can open up growth. We can be confident God still uses us as we are, while trusting He’s creating something new at the same time.
I want to share a wonderful spiritual principle with you that has given me great hope. It is a promise Jesus makes to develop our Christ-like personality, as we depend on Him.
The Law of Fruitfulness:
“If a man remains in me and I in him,
then he will bear much fruit.”
~ John 15:5
How has your faith changed your personality?
Have you seen the “law of fruitfulness” in your life, as you depended on Jesus?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*** NOW, IT’S YOUR TURN — FAITH BARISTA JAM! ***
Faith Barista Jam Thursdays — I serve up a topic of faith, you write the post. Keep faith fresh with a faith prompt and add your voice to this community.
Today’s topic: How Does Your Faith Affect Your Personality?
Submit your post on today’s topic by clicking on the blue button below “Add Your Link”. If you don’t have a blog, share by posting a comment.
Next week’s 10/14 Topic: Making Tough Decisions
Approach it any way you feel inspired! Only required ingredient: keep it real. Thanks for serving your personal brews!
Build the Keep Fresh Fresh Community: Link back to Faith Barista or grab the Faith Barista Jam Badge to place in your post. Click here.
It’s a jam session. As time allows, say hi & drop a comment when visiting the community faith blends!
Photo courtesy of Photobucket.
42 Comments
Type A here too. Praise God for His beautiful undeserved grace that you can teach an “old” dog very new tricks. Without Him, I’d be dreading being 45, still stewing in unforgiveness, envy, and doing nothing to move forward in His dreams for me.
Wonderful faith – Faith in our Father to take that first step – that step, makes you braver to take the next until you just know He can, He will, and He wants to prosper you and never harm you.
Woohoo!!!
Thank You for this Bonnie – “We can be confident God still uses us as we are, while trusting He’s creating something new at the same time.” Amen!!!
I am so thankful that God allows change in me and others.
.-= Katie´s last blog ..Faith Changes Me =-.
I’ve seen too many people change — fundamentally change — to doubt that faith can change personality. One friend who wandered around in a drug-induced haze became a Christian and his life totally turned around. Another was totally consumed with ambition and self became a Christian and became one of the most giving people I’ve ever met. Still another determined to live his faith int he workplace and has done so, often at great personal cost (and when it would be easier to go with the flow). Or the testimony I heard two weeks ago, from a man who had been in prison and is now a church deacon. That’s just four, right off the top of my head.
.-= Glynn´s last blog ..A Poetry Workshop – Part 2 =-.
I’m with Glynn – in fact, I am a person who was radically changed by His grace.
.-= herbhalstead´s last blog ..goodmorning =-.
Thanks so much Bonnie!
I loved this topic and the Type F!
Amazing.
I did my jam last night when I knew I’d have time, so I thought it was very neat that we touched on a few of the same type of things.
We are all so blessed, regardless of the challanges that we have or have had, to have the God that loves us more than we could ever comprehend.
.-= leanna´s last blog ..Sometimes its all I can do =-.
Its amazing how i was going to answer this question at the begining to my answer at the end. My faith has changed everything about me, thank you for the faith jam and for giving my brain a workout.
.-= Saea´s last blog ..Can faith change your personality =-.
A type F personality? Love it!
I love this perspective. I wrote more about my shyness and how faith plays into that – how when we let our personalities limit what we do, we are limiting the amazing things God can do.
Looking forward to reading what everyone else is saying!
.-= Rachel @ the science of music´s last blog ..Faith vs Personality =-.
Faith, the type F, changes my personality daily, as my faith grows and mature, like the tree planted with it’s ever deepening into the living waters of Christ. Without faith, Type A, I am a quivering sapling, afraid of the storms, wind and hail. With faith, I know the storms strengthen me, the rains nourish me, and so I can live more confidently. Thanks for this post.
You have done another great job expounding on the title. I admit I was a little stuck with faith and personality, until I read what you wrote, then it inspired me. Thanks for helping us see ourselves more clearly, see other people more clearly, and most importantly, see God more clearly! Our faith DOES change our personalities, and it’s something we need to give him praise for.
.-= Lisa notes…´s last blog ..Bigger than your personality =-.
Did you know Christians have expectations of other Christians? Some of it’s good. Some of it’s not good. There’s a little pharisee or sadducee in all of us. You’ll find it in every church. One of my fellowship group members once said, “We should always be a good example to unbelievers.” I found fallacy in that statement. A good example is a great idea, but it’s a pit in the road where we will stumble and fall. Instead, God is shown best when we fall because people can see Him pick us up instead of our own self-reliance.
Faith in my life is living every day transparently. Some days are harder than others. Some days I want to put up that veil (as Sheila Walsh said at Women of Faith) and hide reserving my feelings and heart for another day when I feel stronger. But it’s worth it when people see God pick you up. I find it’s okay to make mistakes and not pursue the Type A personality and instead pursue the Type F.
.-= Nikole Hahn´s last blog ..Mama Cried =-.
True faith has caused me to let go — that’s the very nature of the stuff. I don’t need to control my situation, because I can trust a Savior. There are too many other distractions in life when you don’t have faith
I blogged about this today (thank’s for the encouragement) and called it “Suffering from Shiny Object Syndrome.”
http://redletterbelievers.blogspot.com/2010/10/suffering-from-shiny-object-syndrome.html
God’s presence became more important than problem solving—how key! Resting (not inertia) is so counter-intuitive to many. And Type F?! Brilliant! Thanks for another thoughtful and thought provoking post, Bonnie!
Abiding in Christ makes all the difference. Only He can change this personality from one of selfishness and pride to one of love and compassion. I owe it all to Him.
Yes, faith changes my personality. When I live out what I believe it makes a difference in how I treat people. However, as you’ll read in my post my flesh can still come out roaring at times. I can be surprised by that but on this side of eternity we will continue to struggle to some degree.
I pray that the fruit of the Spirit would be more evident in me as I grow in my faith and love for God.
Thanks for this jamming opportunity Bonnie!
Blessings and love,
Debbie
.-= Debbie´s last blog ..Faith Barista Jam Personality and Faith =-.
I thank God that my personality traits can be overcome by faith and grace!
.-= Kristine McGuire´s last blog ..What Do You Do Well Together =-.
Hi Bonnie!
Since giving my life to Jesus 4 years ago …my personality has changed for the better! I can only live by faith in Christ.There is no other way for me. I will never be perfect but God is truly pruning me so I can cultivate all the fruit of the spirit in my life.Thanks again for this post and God’s sweetest blessings to you and all on here!
Lovely essay, Bonnie.
My husband and I were talking last night about faith and trust and where these are placed and in whom. I think it’s difficult to have one without the other. We see our way to grace through both.
.-= Maureen (Mo)´s last blog ..The Heart Takes Its Space Poem =-.
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jason Stasyszen, Jay Cookingham and FaithBarista, FaithBarista. FaithBarista said: New Post — Is Your Personality Set In Stone or Can You Change? http://ow.ly/2Q3fV A question we are all asking today… […]
You know, there was a time, ages ago, like last week, when I would have written this in blah blah. Faith does blah. The Bible says blah. The Greek word for faith is blah and this means blah. Blah blah theology. Blah blah preaching. Blah blah pointing fingers. Blah blah I’m so smart. Then I started reading words written by Bonnie and Ann Voskamp, and Amber Haines, and Holley Gerth.
I’m a man. I first flocked to the blogs of my own kind. They grew my brain. But the ones written by women pierced my heart. I didn’t tear up when I read the men. But of course being male, I never once blobbered while reading the words of the women. No sniveling allowed in the man club, where I must keep my membership card displayed at all times.
And I’m not a poet, I’m a prose guy. I write paragraphs indented, or in straightforward and even blocks. If I write poetry it’s “one fish two fish red fish blue fish”. But I’ve found a different way. You guys, you women “guys”, are teaching me a new language. Your feminine alchemy has morphed me into a tiny poet fledgling that ooopsed itself out of the nest. Maybe I’ll grow. Maybe I’ll fly. Either way, faith assures me I’m in safe hands. One way that faith changes my personality, is that it makes me stretch, seek new ways, new perspectives.
Faith bops me on the head when I think I have the only answer. It admonishes me when I think mine is the only way. It bops and corrects like a cuckoo in a clock that runs 10 times too fast. Faith penetrates souls instead of just brains. Don’t get me wrong. We all need good brain piercings. But the heart, that’s where faith has its firmest footing. My head gets too heavy with too much of the knowing. It’s only my heart, which can learn just as good as my head – my heart that reaches out, while my head remains lodged between my ears and rattles the pebbles from side to side.
I believe and I’m perceptive,
Better eyes see the hidden
And read between lines
I believe and I’m humbly,
confidently,
composed,
Because His will is my will
and I walk no path alone
I believe and my heart is like gold
It doesn’t wear down,
it bends to His touch,
it retains its luster
But me of little faith
Mountains don’t move.
Doubt leaks everywhere, like a water balloon prancing on pins.
Faith the size of a mustard seed?
I only aspire to mustard seed status.
But faith feels forgiveness.
It accepts the pardon.
It doesn’t push it back, like I push away the broccoli.
It spreads it around like I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter on toast,
the ‘just popped up’ toast.
And conforms me into the image of the One
by whom I was created
It makes me more than I am.
When I walk in it I attract.
When I stumble over it I repel.
Faith does nothing but add.
I’m still too little.
But faith is brother to hope.
And hope whispers to me that God is still refining
always refining the gold.
Today, because you made me pause,
and ponder,
and stop,
and line up my words like bunny prints in the snow
instead of even squares of concrete on the sidewalk.
Faith caressed me, velvet glove on chafed skin.
Thanks Bonnie. Color me inspired by you – by all of you.
I’m a few weeks away from giving birth to my blog – it doesn’t even have a name yet – it might even be twins. And I have been burying myself in words that slay. Until then I just twitter my thoughts, like training wheels. So no blog for anyone to dance over to – but on twitter I’m Craig_believes. And this little contribution to the jam is sponsored by the letter F and the number 3, and the wellspring of all that is good and all who believe. And anyone who wants to follow my bunny prints over to my tweets, until they grow up into posts, is as welcome as the last butterflies just before the first blast of winter.
Another cuppa good stuff! Always love to see the many facets of one topic….praise God! Love the personality type you’ve uncovered….it must come with His blood transfusion in our hearts…
.-= marina bromley´s last blog ..dr jekyl and mrs hyde =-.
So grateful for the God who can transform us from the inside out… no matter what the obstacles 🙂
.-= Jenny´s last blog ..YOU-create — Prayer Triggers =-.
What a powerful reminder of the role of faith in our lives, Bonnie. I’m so glad that it’s not about denying who we are and trying to change ourselves from perceived negative traits. It’s about turning it all over to God through surrender and trust so that he can turn the weakness into a fountain of His strength. What a way to live! Gets me all kinds of excited!
Thank you–truly wonderful post today!
.-= jasonS´s last blog ..Some Reflective- Corrective Thinking =-.
I linked up, but I wanted to respond here as well. I’m not sure if my personality has changed, or if I’ve just learned to control it better. I still have those tendencies to control, to boss, to focus on the task instead of the person, to lose my temper, to rush ahead, and all the rest.
However, God has shown me how to resist those urges, to work in the fruit of the Spirit. Fundamentally, I’m still the same me I was at six-years-old. It’s just a more mature, self-controlled, loving me.
I have always loved the scene in Little Women where Jo discovers that Marmie has a temper. Jo feels overwhelmed by her inability to control it, and that’s when Marmie gives her the tricks that she’s discovered. Marmie still has a temper, still is impulsive, but she has learned through her faith and self-discipline, to control it.
.-= Melissa Brotherton´s last blog ..Transforming my crazy =-.
“Once I realized my efforts were futile, I began to see God take control of me.”
This is a great point! So often it comes down to our control vs. God’s. I am sure I am more qualified to run my life, but than God has a way of reminding me that its not about my comfort level or my precious personality style – its about His plan to use me to affect His kingdom…sometimes that means I need to change my personality to one that is more like His!
Great topic. Thanks.
[…] Linked up to this week’s Faith Jam on personality and faith. Share and Enjoy: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web pages. […]
Funny that we would write on similar vein. Or maybe it’s a God-thing. 🙂
http://joyinthisjourney.com/2010/10/my-personality-was-my-faith/
Faith~ the Word~ Hope~ has changed me and is changing me. I truly think it happens. I am becoming more aware of what is REALLY going on around me. Do I like what I see? Some times…YES!!! {and some times ….no.} Is it because my eyes have been opened to some thing else? Have I come to a better under standing of what it is that I REALLY NEED and WANT in my life verses what I am willing to put up with because of the fear of being rejected if I stand up?
Yes..rejected…by some friends? Laughed at by family? Hear those little remarks that are being made just a bit out of ears reach …. “oh, she has changed…she is all “churchy” now…” Shouldn’t we WANT to be “churchy” always?
But with Faith and my changed personality I am going to stand up. I am going to weed out. I am going to go forward being ME! Liking ME…the one God made! It’s OK….I want to live God’s Way…not the Sinner’s Way. {And yes, I still may sin…it’s an ongoing battle isn’t it?} But, thank goodness with forgiveness and faith I will carry on with God by my side.
Change is good. {So funny that in January of 2010 I picked a word to define what kind of year I wanted…..that word I picked was…Change. I feel it’s been a wonderful year so far!}
Thanks Bonnie for a great post!
Thanks, Bonnie! You get us thinking and praying!
I am thankful that the Lord is not in the business of making assembly-line, look-alike, carbon-copy followers,
but that he has given us all a unique and special personality which he will shape and use for his will!
Hey – just look at those 12 disciples! Some different as night and day! God uses us all. We all bring and will bring him glory! What a great God!
Wow Bonnie.
Thank you so much for yet another inspiring and encouraging post.
Only this week, I was trying to explain to my sister, that I sensed that my true personality (the one that God created), was now coming through.
I couldn’t quite explain how I felt, but your post has given clarity to my thoughts.
I have found that as I lean more on my heavenly Father, I get closer to Him and as I get closer to Him, my faith increases and in turn my personality has been changing, albeit slowly, to the one He created in me.
God Bless you more
.-= Carole in the UK´s last blog ..Dont forget to Mind Your Manners =-.
“It became more important to me to feel God’s presence than to have my problems solved.”
Beautiful. What peace we experience when we do this!
Your words are always a soothing balm to my spirit! Love ya, girl!
.-= Kristen@Moms Sharpening Moms´s last blog ..Cast Your Net =-.
Love this post, beautiful friend! And it is so true. The only real change I’ve ever seen in my life have been because God has done the changing. I never realized that before! Whew, I need to relax more. 🙂
.-= Holley Gerth´s last blog ..When youre looking for a little more joy =-.
Wow! I never thought of it quite like that – personality type F. That’s more of what I am now. I used to be a very strong A, but with some very difficult times came more faith and wonderful growth in Christ. Thank you so much for sharing!
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Holley Gerth and Sister Toldjah, Sister Toldjah. Sister Toldjah said: AWESOME devo! RT @HolleyGerth People can change because God changes people.–Love this from @TheBonnieGray http://bit.ly/b5CL8t […]
[…] post has been linked with the Faith Barista’s Faith Jam. Share and enjoy: This entry was posted in Encouragement, Faith, Uncategorized. Bookmark the […]
I am at the beginning of my faith and was feeling a bit ‘flat’ today. i stumbled upon this on the internet and was exactly what I needed to read. I suppose after some initial ‘highs’ about discovering god and Jesus i think I assumed that I would feel that happy, all the time and my irritating tendency to worry and obsess about things would never return. These traits have returned a bit and I suppose Im feeling a little disheartened but still know that I must continue building my relationship with Jesus. Its so true what you have said about joy bringing your personality to life. As a mum of 3, how my spirit is doing has a direct impact on my lovely kids who light up when they see that I am joyful.
Thank you for having the insight to discussing this topic, so glad its not just me who ponders over such things.x.
I am glad to have found your blog and I am also in this kind of thoughts. I am a convert Muslim from Christian faith originally. I am too interested in how faith changes not only your personality, but also your conception of life. Faith has changed me and how I feel, what I say, what I believe and what I do from inside out e.g. my clothes, my appearances, my heart and mind. Faith is a powerful tool for changes.
[…] How Does Faith Affect Personality? My friend Bonnie is hosting a Faith Jam over at her blog Faith Barista. Today Bonnie asks the question "How does faith affect your […]
[…] you? To read more adventures on faithchanging people’s personalities today jump on over to Faith Barista! Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:Like […]
[…] How Does Faith Affect Personality? My friend Bonnie is hosting a Faith Jam over at her blog Faith Barista. Today Bonnie asks the question "How does faith affect your […]
You know bonny i have the same problem , i hope my personality can shine again one day :/ , im like 13 years old and i just want my spark back so i can be who i am and be my old fun loving self . pray for me please , i know you dont know me but plzz do !! ( sorry about the other comment i meant to write it here )
Sherry – thanks for sharing. Lord Jesus, reassure Sherry of your presence and your promise. You see her. You love her.
[…] How is faith changing you? To read more adventures on faithchanging people’s personalities today jump on over to Faith Barista! […]
[…] you? To read more adventures on faithchanging people’s personalities today jump on over to Faith Barista! This entry was posted in Everyday Adventures, Everything Else on October 7, 2010 by […]